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Module 7.6: Thoughts are NOT Facts

The realization that thoughts are not facts is vitally relevant to all of us.

Our thinking will often reflect our mood and mode of mind, not what is "actually" here or who we actually are.

Thoughts are not facts.

We need to start observing and recognizing thoughts as thoughts, to bring awareness to them as discrete mental events, and to see each thought as simply a thought, an idea in the mind.

We use the phrase "thoughts are not facts" to suggest that we don't have to believe everything we think or take it as absolute truth.

Exercise: Thoughts and Feelings

We ask that you settle into a comfortable position, feet on the floor, eyes closed, and imagine the following scenario:

 - You are walking down the street, and on the other side of the street you somebody you know. You smile and wave. The person just doesn't seem to notice and walks by.

Take a moment to become aware of what is going through your mind, including your thoughts, feelings, or bodily sensations you might have. Then, open your eyes. Notice any feelings or bodily sensations you experienced and any thoughts or images that went through your mind.

Thoughts and Feelings

The main message to draw from this exercise is that our emotions are consequences of a situation, plus an interpretation. This is the basic ABC model of emotional distress. So often we find ourselves in a situation (A) and end up with a feeling (C). Normally, these are the things of which we are most aware. Often we are not aware of a thought (B) that links them. It is as if there is this stream of thoughts present all the time, just under the surface, of which we are not aware. These thoughts are often not very obvious, particularly when we are not severely depressed, but they actually determine which emotion we feel, and how strongly we feel it.

One thing to notice is that all these different feelings come about because the same event is being given a lot of different interpretations. If you interpret the event as simply the other person not seeing you because of their own problems or from being preoccupied, then you feel sorry for the other person. If you interpret the event as being a rejection or a hostile gesture, then you get angry.

The fact that interpretations of the same situation can vary from person to person, tells us that thoughts are not facts.

When you become aware of negative thoughts and images in your mind, hold them in awareness, with an attitude of gentle interest and curiosity, perhaps expanding awareness to include one or more of the following:

 - Perhaps I am confusing a thought with a fact?
 - Perhaps I am jumping to conclusions?
 - Perhaps I am thinking in black and white terms?
 - Perhaps I am condemning myself totally because of one thing?
 - Perhaps I am concentrating on my weaknesses and forgetting my strengths?
 - Perhaps I am blaming myself for something that isn't my fault?
 - Perhaps I am judging myself?
 - Perhaps I am setting unrealistically high standards for myself so that I will fail?
 - Perhaps I am mind reading?
 - Perhaps I am expecting perfection?
 - Perhaps I am overestimating disaster?

The keynote attitude to take with your thoughts is a gentle interest and curiosity.

 Practicing Thoughts are Not Facts

When you put some space between you and your reaction, it changes your relationship to your thoughts - you can watch them come and go instead of treating them as matter of fact.
If you're stuck on a negative thought, ask yourself:

1. Is it true?
Often the answer is "Well, yes". This is the brain initially reacting - the autopilot you live with and believe is you.

2. Is it absolutely true?
Is this thought 100% accurate? Can you see the thought in a different way?

3. How does this thought make me feel?
Notice any story lines you're holding onto, and name your feelings: sad, angry, jealous, hurt, etc.

4. What would things be like if I didn't hold this belief?
Imagine possible benefits to your relationships, energy levels, and motivation.
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